Something Greyish

Yesterday my Manager asked me to go with her do so errands for the office. I agreed, ever so reluctantly. The mere thought of spending time with Diane is exhausting. She is mainly a good person. But she is also an energy sucker and in every other aspects of her personality, a peasant. But in her mind she was doing me a favor and thus left me no choice, I had to go.

On our merry ride, we stopped at Costco. I was glade for the opportunity of getting a few blocks of Parmesan cheese, since my membership had expired a few months earlier, but the experience left me dizzier than I expected. Not only did we not need to patron this establishment for the office, but she further insisted that we go through every aisles. At some point, between the cream puffs and the cheese cakes in the frozen section, there was a display of Poinsettias’. In each pot someone, presumably the Poinsettias’ marketer, had planted sparkling red or silver stars held on metal rods. Diane stopped dead in her tracks. I believe I neglected to mention earlier that Diane has also a pronounced taste for knick knacks of all kind, mainly the useless, cheapest ones and in vast quantities. Her office at best of times looks like a dollar store on clearance day.

Diane was frozen in front the Poinsettias’ display. At first I thought she had in mind to get one, but it was the little stars that had caught her attention. Quickly she pulled out a red and a silver one and asked me which one I preferred. None really, but if I must choose, the red one I guess. She immediately put them both in the upper basket of our cart. In fact, not only did she put them in the cart, but she deliberately put them under the red plastic cover which I assume is designed to close the openings when there is no child sitting in the cart. I thought for a moment she was about to buy it for me. How embarrassing. But I was all wrong; she was planning on stealing it for me! I was mortified. What is the etiquette in such circumstances? What are you supposed to do? I had a quick note to self, a reminder to keep my drawers locked at all times from now on, but what are you suppose to say? I mean, she is my boss. If I go along does it mean I am a thief? Would it extend to the workplace? Was it a test of character? I was stunned. So I chose to wait and see.

Fortunately or not, a nosy cashier spotted the deed right away. She asked a few questions, but luckily I was a mile away from the action at that time, entirely focused on some guy’s advertizing a land mower for sale. I would have bought it if it had guarantied a faster exiting of the premises.

On our way out, it was pretty obvious that I had not appreciated to be part of this great plan. Not the least fazed by my – stuck up – attitude, she explained that it was actually Costco’s fault for not selling the stars on their own. They had forced her to do such a thing. Candidly she explained that it was routine for her to – adjust – prices or ownership on items of choice. It was not really stealing; stealing is such a dark, dark word, it was something greyer…

Well, stuck up or not, to me it felt like shoplifting. We had three more stores to visit that afternoon, needless to say, it was a long one.